TMGB

The next page of stupid

Or maybe this one?

The Mean Green Bean

I'm entertaining myself with this story I'm writing. It's ridiculous, its a "children's story" and I'm illustrating it for my kids.

Why?

I want them to learn some valuable life lessons in an entertaining way.

Here are a couple of pages.

See if you can determine the theme.

I'll add a few pages over the next month.

Maybe, when it comes to sex ed I'll do this for them.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

a day of firsts ...

And most definitely not the good kind.

I forgot to pick Mana up from school yesterday.

By the time I remembered and realized, I was already 35 mins late.

When I did remember I freaked out, jumped up and ran out of my office in a panic.

I saw my sister and I'm sure she saw the absolutely wild look in my eye and she said "Stephen said the school called, Mana is ok, he's in the office" as I bolted out the door to my car.

Obviously my overactive imagination envisioned all manner of frightful scenarios, and as I drove to the school to pick Mana up, I called my husband completely hysterical.

There was crying, hyperventilating, you know, the whole deal.

Stephen, as usual, was awesome. Calm and understanding, he talked me through my over reaction, tried to comfort me when I was feeling utterly worthless, and reminded me "you'll have a hard time getting over this, you won't do it again, so don't be so hard on yourself".

I imagined my poor sensitive son sitting in the school office crying (he's a crier) and the emotional toll it would have taken on him. 

I know, I got a bit carried away, I often do when it comes to my kids.

So, I pull into the parking lot, run into the office and the Principal is sitting in his office and asks me, with a smile on his face, who I'm there to pick up.

I tell him Mana, and his teacher walks out of an office and says "'l'lI go get him, he's playing outside with the other kids".

The Principal walks out of his office, a knowing look in his eye and says "This must be the first time you've forgotten your child".

I sign him out of school and take a seat to wait for him, trying to slow my heart palpitations.

I hear my boy before I see him, and he's all smiles, holding his teachers hand and runs over to me, filled with excitement "I played soccer with some bigger kids, it was super cool Mummy!".

I reached down to cuddle him, finally relieved he's safe (as if he wasn't) and hear "Mummy, stop, don't cuddle me any more". Tear.

No worries for my son.

And now I'm left with the "mum guilt" or "mom guilt" as my friend put it.

That's the guilt I will endure when I miss anything, significant or not, in my child's life.
Then there is the "mum work guilt" when I miss anything because of work.

Ah that's a choice you make when decide to work.

Damn, sometimes!

you disappeared on me!

Ah reader. That I did.

I disappeared, for a spell.

My grandma died.

I cried about that.

I went to New Zealand. 

And actually missed living there.

My job changed. 

My son is going to pre-school.

Sometimes you get offline to deal with life.

But ... I'm back.

And full of snark.

You break it, you bought it!

Today, Mana learned one of life's indeliable lessons, "You break it, you bought it".
He and one of his buddies at day care decided they would do something exceptionally clever today.
They lifted one of the plastic tables from IKEA, put their weight on the table top, and snapped two legs off the table.
(see below)

After I walked in and discovered what my child had chosen to do today, he and I had to have a chat.
I asked Mana "Did you do this?" in a small voice, he whispered "Yes".
We discussed why he did this (I don't know, we pushed on it and it broke) and the we talked about the consequences.
I sat him down and told him, first things first, you better apologize, and he walked over to Lesia, his daycare provider, with tears in his eye's and said "I'm so sorry Lesia".
I explained to him, when you break something that doesnt belong to you, you have to replace it. When you replace things like a table, things that cost money, you have to earn money or sell something.
One of his favourite things to play with is his Nintendo DS and one of his favourite games is Scribble Naughts.
I told him "Well Mana, you're going to have to sell your Scribble Naughts game so you can get some money to give to Lesia, and replace her table", still teary eyed from apologizing, he nodded his head in agreement.
On our drive home, with his little heart all broken, he said to me "Mummy, are you disappointed in me?" to which I replied "Yes son, I am. But I love you very much".

Somewhat understanding what he had to do Mana decided to empty his piggy bank so he could give his coins to pay for the table.

He wrote a letter to Lesia and we put all his coins in a ziplock bag to take to her tomorrow.
For him, he is learning to sacrifice something he loves (Scribble Naughts and his coin bank) and to understand it's important to take care of other people's belonging's.
Can he comprehend it all right now? I don't know.
But a foundation of accountabilty can begin to form.

My hope for my children

Sometimes, it feels a little bit like I live in a time warp.

Last night I went to sleep with a new born baby, as a first time mother, nervous, overwhelmed and in awe of the life Stephen and I had created.

This morning I woke up 5 and a half years later, with two kids who go to preschool, think for themselves, and have wonderful idea's on what they should eat, play with, and do with their day.

Time flies doesn't it?

I worry about the world my children will be raised in.
I worry about the world my children will raise their children in.

I worry about my competence as a parent, and as an example of how a woman should be.

I hope my children always love me, and respect me, even when they don't like me.

I want my children to be good people. 

To be strong, kind, loving, independent, confident, honest people.

I want them to think for themselves, formulate their own ideas, fail sometimes, learn the hard lessons and build character.

I want them to understand the value of hard work, how to earn their keep and pay for themselves. 

I want them to learn to apologize, admit when they are wrong, to never be too proud to say sorry.

I want them to live their dreams, be successful and to truly find happiness.

I want them to be proud of their heritage and understanding of others.
I want them to be open to new experiences and enjoy all the first's life has to offer.

I will say no to them. 

I won't debate with them ... right now. 

Because they are 3 and 5, and I'm right.

When they whine and tell me "I want to do that" sometimes I will tell them " I don't really care what you want" .

Not because I don't care about their wants, it's important to learn that just because you want something, doesn't mean you'll get it. 

I'll focus on their needs.

And whining is annoying.

I'll try my hardest not to pressure them into do things just because I want them to.

But, when they decide to play a sport, or take music lessons, I will make them stick to it for a couple of years and not just give up. 

I will help them learn the value of commitment, help them learn the importance of their word and help them understand that doing things you don't always want to do, will build character.
I want them to be humble when they win, and gracious when they lose.

We will teach them the value of the dollar. 

The importance of paying tithing.

The satisfaction of saving money to buy something you want.

We will also teach them as children, just because you have the money to buy something, does not mean you can buy whatever you want (M15+ video games for a 10 year old? NO).

Sometimes, they'll think I'm old fashioned, and my values are old school, and I won't care.

I will teach my kids to read, and hope they develop a love for it much as Stephen and I do.

I will teach them to use their imagination, and to enjoy being the age they are.

I will encourage them to have real life role models. 

Their father, grandfathers, uncles, good men who have real life influence over them.

Sometimes my kid's aren't going to like me.

In fact sometimes I think they'll actually believe they hate me. 

Sometimes, I'm going to make decisions for them that make them feel justified in their feelings of hatred. 

I will always put their safety first, and make decisions based on what I feel is right, and if they don't like me because of it, I'm okay with that. 

I'm here to be a parent, to raise my children to learn right from wrong, and then trust them to make good decisions ... when they turn 18  ...or maybe 30?

I will teach them to be accountable, for their words and their actions.


Some advice from my Grandma on endurance, words of wisdom I hope to impart on my children: You keep going because you have to. What, do you think someone else is going to do it for you?

In short, my hope for my children is love.

That they love each other, love themselves, and love life.